Monophobia
by COFF33MAN1A
Summary: It’s then that I realize how messed up my life is. How I live with a man who I might be in love with, a man who gave up on trying to love me back. NaruSasu.


23:05

It's then that I realize how messed up my life is. How I live with a man who I might be in love with, a man who gave up on trying to love me back. NaruSasu.

**Something just kinda spurred me on to write this. I don't exactly know what the hell is going through my head, just random plot-less thoughts. Hopefully it'll turn into a fair story.**

- - -

I can't remember the reason Uchiha Sasuke and I decided to move in together. I think it was after that English class when Hatake Kakashi, again, decided not to show up for class and the substitute passed out a test-like worksheet to assess what kind of phobia we had. Now that would have been quite interesting had he not collected them and read our phobias out loud to the class.

While most people had exotic fears and cool, brag-worthy titles, I was labeled with monophobia: the fear of being alone. It's honestly not that I dislike being by myself, sometimes the quiet helps me think… and okay, perhaps that's a bit of an understatement, but certainly I didn't need some jerk to look after me!

Of course, being the jerk that he is, and I wonder why the hell he's even my friend, he wondered if I was lonely at night, and if I, perhaps, wanted to move in.

"Dobe, it's not a sin to admit you're afraid at night," his voice was like sugar. It was rough; yet so quiet I could barely get it through my head that this was Sasuke talking to me.

"I'm not, asswhipe," I retorted. Honestly, could he get it through his head? And people called him a genius… "And I most definitely don't need you looking after my ass,"

"So it's settled then," he took a step closer to me, I attempted to take a step back only to find that my back was already pressed against a locker, the more I inched backwards, wishing to walk through the locker like a ghost, the more the lock dug into the small of my back. "Get your things packed, I'll meet you at five,"

"I never agreed to your deal, dipshit," I snapped, my voice perhaps an octave higher than usual as I wondered exactly what was going through his head. I'll admit it, I liked the guy, he _was_ my friend, and a close one at that, but did he _need_ to make me feel like shit? Like I couldn't take care of myself? Yes, yes he did.

"Not out loud," Sasuke smirked back, his smooth voice not at all phased by our sudden closeness. His hot breath on my face made me ache for freedom, the vice grip he had on each of my wrists, pressing them to the lockers made me want to throw up.

"I hope you go die, asswhipe," I growled, kneeing him in that sensitive spot. To my strange surprise, he let go without a scream of pain, or even a flinch in pain. I wonder if, perhaps, he's not all that hot 'man-candy' everybody believes him to be.

Sasuke chuckled and turned his back to me. He walked down the hallway, just far enough that I could barely hear his voice in the deserted hall. He called my name over his shoulder, not my nickname, not an insult, just my name. Just 'Naruto'. "I'll see you at five,"

The sickening feeling comes back to my stomach, like I feel dirty, yet I took a shower mere hours earlier before embarking on my journey to hell, er, school. I surprise myself by nodding, even though he's not looking anymore. I'm agreeing to his retarded deal, just because of some silly quiz a substitute teacher gave us. I agree because in truth, I am just that scared little boy who coils up in his bed at night, wishing somebody would pay attention to me.

And somebody did, granted it was Uchiha Sasuke who finally looked my way, and even if over half the time we screeched insults at one another, and our silly banters had us sent to the principle's office more than the rest of the school combined; but at least he saw me, at least he noticed me, even if just to bump my shoulder extra hard in the hallway as he passed.

It still meant everything to me that he cared.

- - -

And that's how I came to live with Uchiha Sasuke. That's why, at the moment, I'm sitting, curled up in his spot on the sofa, wondering when he's going to come home. It's been five minutes, and sure, I'm not that worried, except that Sasuke is never late to anything, even just coming home at night.

Fifteen minutes pass, I'm actually starting to worry. I turn towards the phone; staring so hard I'm finding it hard to believe the phone doesn't just burn up.

"Where are you, Uchiha?" I murmur softly, not bothering to wipe the tears away when they form in my eyes.

As if to answer my call, the phone rings. I pick up, all too happy, forgetting the rule both Sasuke and I share: Never pick the phone up before it's rung twice. I don't care, I'm too eager to hear Sasuke's icy voice.

It's not him, but another man, "Uchiha residence?" the man asks. I growl inwardly, doesn't he have a clue that this is the Uchiha-Uzumaki residence? The Uzumaki part happens to be quite important to me. But it's like this every time. Nobody remembers the 'Uzumaki' because, quite frankly, nobody remembers me, the twenty three year old man who has no purpose in life but to provide some sort of sick entertainment for the ever-popular Uchiha Sasuke.

"I guess so," I mumble back, almost wishing it were Sasuke's voice I was hearing, not this man's.

"Who's speaking?" I roll my eyes; _he_ called _me_. Who calls a house and asks who's speaking? Even I, the boy who never properly learned my manners, knew that one.

"You ask me," I reply sarcastically, still a bit peeved. What if Sasuke called right now, and I was on the phone. I would miss hearing his voice. And that, no matter how much I may externally dislike the man, was the best part of my day. Knowing that he'd always come back home, and I wouldn't be lonely anymore.

"Is the Uchiha mistress there?"

"Mistress?" I ask, ever so slightly confused. What mistress? Does Sasuke talk about having a beautiful woman at home, waiting for his return instead of the pathetic excuse for a man he has now? I sigh, "I guess you could say that, yeah,"

"May I speak with her, please?"

"You just might be,"

I can hear the man sigh on the other end. Not exactly something I'm too happy about. "I would have expected a man like Mr. Uchiha to have a lovely wife," he confessed, not sympathetic at all for his words.

"Everybody does," I mutter, too low for him to catch on the other end of the phone.

Before you get any sick ideas, we're not dating, we're not even close friends. We're just Sasuke and Naruto. You could hardly call the guy who sits at home on your couch, watching TV all day and eating your food to pass the time your lover, or even really a friend. I'm just a burden, another something to have to take care of, like a sick dog that you find on the street and have to nurse back to health. Only, I'm the sick dog that was nursed back to health and can't quite find the will to leave.

"I wish I didn't have to be the bearer of bad news," the man sighed again. My heart stopped for a second; did he just say bad news? Because I think he did, and I think I'm going to need CPR to restart my heart. "Mr. Uchiha seemed to have run a red light, his car was hit by a van, I'm sorry."

"Excuse me, but _what the hell did you just say_?" I couldn't help but screech the words, "can you repeat that one more time for me?"

"Mr. Uchiha's not dead, if that's what you're concerned about," I wiped my bow, relieved. Slowly, my heart began to pound again; albeit, quite loudly, but it was still working.

"What happened?"

"He's at Konoha General Hospital, critical condition,"

And my heart stopped again, "w-will he s-s-survive?" the words barely passed my lips through my hiccoughing and crying. Why was I getting so emotional? I didn't even like the man all too much. He was only a way to get rid of the pain of being alone. He was never anything more than a toy, a game, a distraction. What if he died?

There was a sound on the other end of the line, like the phone was moving, or he was moving. Was he shaking his head? "We don't know," And then the line went dead. No other questions, no goodbye, no 'I'm sorry' just a somber, unanswered question.

And then I broke down. I cried harder that night than any other night in my whole life. Harder than the night when my parents died. I'm not even sure why, surely my parents were more important to me than this man.

Perhaps it was because he was the last thing I had to connect me to the world. He was the last person I could call a family, the only person who noticed me when I needed to be noticed. He was my light, and now that he was gone, there was nothing but darkness.

That night, I was visited by an angel. Maybe I'm going crazy, but I swear this dream was for real. I could see Sasuke's face in my dream. He was hooked up to an IV, tubes to help him breath were inserted in his nose. But he looked perfect, calm, the way he slept, the way he looked was amazing. Like the van never hit him.

Was that a sign that he was dead? No, because he moved. Twitched. Just a slight twitch of his eye, but I saw it. My eyes widened, I could feel them. The angel beside me smiled.

"You love him," she said. I laughed, that was a lie, a pure lie.

"I'd rather eat dirt," I confessed, smiling slightly. The angel shook her head.

"Would you save him?"

I sighed, I walked into that one, "Probably,"

"If I told you that you could, what would you do?"

I laughed again, but my voice sounded distorted, "I don't believe in that kind of shit,"

The angel smiled almost in an apologetic way. "If you could give your life up to save his, would you?"

I thought for a second. It was a no-brainer. I hated my life, I constantly wondered what the hell I was still doing sitting on the couch wasting my days away. My voice was small when I answered, "yes,"

"I'll make a deal with you, then, Naruto," the angel said, her perfect features were nothing compared to Sasuke's in the dream, yet her smile still managed to mesmerize me. "Live with him, Naruto. Teach him the way, help him find himself. And I assure you he shall be fine,"

"How do I do that?" I asked, what was this lady getting into?

"Make him love you," and with that she was gone, leaving me to look down on the dying man, "if you manage to do it in one year, you both live happily ever after. If you fail, you both die," her voice echoed through my head.

I blinked, suddenly awake on the couch that I failed to remove myself from upon hearing the news of Sasuke's accident.

"And how the hell am I supposed to do that?" I muttered to myself, wondering whether that was a dream or if I was truly beginning to crack. To better prove the later, I could have sworn I heard a voice say 'you'll find out,'

So, lets sum this up real quick, because I'm not sure I understand any of this bullshit. I'm supposed to make a man love me, when I don't even love him myself, nor do I ever want to. I rub my temples warily, finding it hard to go back to sleep. But if it's worth saving Sasuke's life, even for just one more year, it's well worth it to me.

- - -

that concludes my depressing chapter one. Mind you, I'm just writing off the top of my head, but I have a feeling I know where this is going to end up… hopefully…

I hope you enjoyed. Please review!


End file.
